My Birthday with Quinn

I promise that I will get to the birthday story, but first I need to write a little bit about my husband, Eric. It will make the whole thing come together much better :) Some of you know Eric better than you know me. Some of you only know him through me. And some of you don't really know him at all. But Eric is the best man that I know.

With T18 babies, or any Angel Baby actually, I'm not sure that it registers that the daddy's hurt just as much as us momma's. It's true that I am Quinn's Mommy and that there is a very special bond there. I feel him kick and wiggle, I have him with me 24/7, he is my baby boy. But Eric is his Daddy. Eric had just as many dreams for Quinn as I did, if not more. Quinn was going to be his first son, his camping buddy, his team mate, his best friend. He was going to take him to U of U football games, teach him sports and coach his little league teams. He was going to laugh and play with him everyday. He was going to teach him what it means to be a gentleman, a good friend, a priesthood holder, a good husband and a great dad. And now Eric has had to do what all these daddy's have had to, and let those things go for now.

Eric has been my rock and support since that life changing day in May. He holds me close and just lets me cry. He calms me and helps me recollect my thoughts as we review what doctors have said. He has made it to every single appointment we have had for Quinn and is able to keep his head/thoughts together so he remembers all the questions we've been waiting to ask. He keeps his head high, smiles and squeezes my hand when random people at the store or movies ask about when we are due, what Quinn's name is, how the pregnancy has been, etc. He talks to Quinn, he jokes with him, he tells him stories about his childhood or his mission or funny things about us. He sings to him and reads to him. He still makes me smile and laugh every single day (no joke, it's amazing!).

And through it all, he has never wavered. He has never been mad at the situation. He has never complained. He has never thought "why us".  It's true that we grieve very differently but that's ok, honestly. Because Eric has shown more love to Quinn then I ever thought possible.

Eric's name means "honorable ruler". Perfect words to describe the kind of man he has turned out to be. He is the best husband and friend I could have dreamed of. He is also the best example and best father for our baby boy, and I sincerely believe that Quinn knows that. :)

So... yesterday was my 27th birthday! Let me start by saying that I LOVE MY BIRTHDAY. I know, it's kind of odd. I think the reason I love it so much is that with it  being in August, it's pretty much the only "holiday" around, so it's another fun excuse to get family/friends together. When we first found out I was pregnant with Quinn, I couldn't wait till my birthday this year! It would mean that I'd hit my third trimester mark and in my head would be just putting the "finishing touches" on a nursery and baby shopping, hospital bag prepping, etc. It was going to be a really exciting mark in my first pregnancy. Well, things don't always go as planned. :) So with Quinn's diagnoses, I've really just avoided the thought of my birthday. When I finally had to face that it was coming up, I was really dreading it.

Eric knew this. He knew how much I had been looking forward to it and how now it was just one more memory to yank at my heart. I had work off for my birthday and the night before, I went to bed just hoping I would sleep through most of the day so I wouldn't have to face it. But (this is why I get to dibbs that Eric is the best husband ever, sorry ladies!)...HE SURPRISED ME AND GOT THE DAY OFF TOO!!! I woke up that morning in a panic thinking that Eric had slept through the alarm, only to find out that he was going to spend the whole day with me!!! I know this may sound silly to some of you, but it honestly meant the world to me. It was just so thoughtful and meaningful to me on this birthday.

Our day went something like this...
We got to cuddle and sleep in. Then we went to Tepenyaki for lunch! I had been craving to go there for a while now :). After that, we went to the Hogle Zoo!! This is something that I've REALLY wanted to do with Quinn. It was always a tradition we had with my Daddy growing up and the fact that Eric could do it with Quinn is absolutely priceless to me. We got to talk to him about the giraffes, seals and elephants, and showed him the swimming polar bear and covered his eyes while the sea lions got it on (yes, you read that right). We saw all the animals and talked to him about each of them. Eric and I shared our stories of going to the Zoo when we were younger and told Quinn how much it has changed. He got to eat his first "Dippin Dots" ice cream (and loved it!! He wiggled with happiness the whole time we ate them!). We then went for a drive up Big Cottonwood Canyon. Eric loves the mountains and I have so many great memories from growing up with a cabin in Solitude Resort. Eric showed Quinn some good campgrounds and fire pits while I pointed out Papas favorite fishing spot. I took him and Eric to our old cabin and told them both how it was the best place to be growing up. I also got to show them both "The Brighton Store" and share how my Mom loved to go with Papa and everyone to get ice cream there.

Eric was so kind and thoughtful for being so attentive to help me not dread my birthday next year. He made sure that it was a happy day, filled with lots of making memories and sharing with him and Quinn so many things that made my childhood so great. It was the perfect day. :)